My Over Full Mug!

After the Pennine way Challenge I made a promise to myself, that I was going to take more time off and do less, chill a bit more. Work smarter and not harder. After all, that was one of the lessons I had learnt from the Pennine Way.

I’m not sure when I decided to throw that idea out of the window, however, I did.  It’s another example of not learning from our experiences and acting more sensibly. How many lessons did we learn from Covid and the lockdown.  We were forced to stop polluting our world and experience it, to slow down and value each other, value human contact, a fundamental part of being human.  We spent our money on our homes and the space we live in, dare I say it, we grew spiritually.

And guess what, as soon as life returned to what we perceive as normal, or the new normal as we called it, we very quickly forgot those lessons, jumped back in our cars and aeroplanes and resumed lives at a mental pace that possibly were even worse than before, ‘well we’ve got to catch up on lost time’.

Or just stayed in because we had forgotten how to go out, or we allowed fear to monopolise us.

My wife sat me down last week and said, ‘Look Simon’, I know there’s a speech coming when my actual name is used, ‘You’re doing too much, and quite frankly you’re not doing any of it well. You’re trying to hold down a job, run a business, run a charity, write a book, be a husband, father and grandfather and quite frankly you’re not doing any of them well’.

That was a bit of a wake-up call to be fair. Add to that, that money is tight right now and it’s not possibly the best place to be.

I guess the first thing to note, is that you need people around you to tell you what you can’t see for yourself. Especially if you’re driven in what you do.  It’s possible that only my wife that could have got me to listen in this situation.

She wrote the message on my office window when I was in it and I didn’t notice (I added the blue bits!).

Till later!

We have an inbuilt system within us, quite possibly instigated by the Victorians, that requires us to be busy. Our parents often told us, ‘work hard, get good grades and you’ll be OK’. As someone who has run businesses, our coaches tell us, ‘all success is paid for in full now’, meaning in the beginning we have to do everything, marketing, admin, stock control, accounting, and have a process for them. Write a business plan and monitor it.

We are hard wired for hard work.

It’s hard to see when we are on the inside looking out.

Which is why we need people on the outside looking in.

If you’re cup is ‘over full’ then there is no room for anything else to slide in, or come crashing in come to that.

The first thing to do is always take some time to reflect. I have to admit I found it difficult to function properly for a couple of days and I needed help to deal with that in the first instance. However, slowly, you begin to process things and things can begin to take on a more meaningful shape. And then quite possibly take on a different shape after that.

Working with ‘looked after’ children, ADHD is something that I’m becoming very aware of, that I obviously have. It takes me a while to process information and then begin to manage it. I’ve always said that waiting 24 hours after any news of great importance is crucial. This was no exception.

This is not the place for wild statements of changes, that’ll come, but its not now.

The important thing here is, in the first instance to take time to reflect where you are and what you are doing.

Again, as my wife said, ‘if you’re not looking after yourself, you can’t help anyone else’.

I felt if I took time out, I would be letting one person down in particular, but steeled myself to tell her, and when I did, she said, ‘your own mental health is the most important thing right now. Sort yourself out and then we’ll pick things up once again.’

That was a massive relief too.

I got off shift at 10am on Saturday and I’ve stayed away from social media and E mails and just had quality family time and its been fan bloody tastic.

I’m going to catch up on the admin that’s backed up over the weeks I’ve not had time to get to it and then chill a little.

If you are full up, the nothing else can get in. Not even the good stuff!

Look after yourselves, it’s a busy world out there, and it’ll gobble you up if you let it.

Remember what you know!

Simon Pollard Jan 25